One of Those Moments

As I sit here trying to figure out how to blog my latest feelings, it just seems to become more difficult with each passing second.  But in that same moment, God keeps reminding me of my memory verse for this time period:  "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."  Joshua 1:9 NLT

I am trying so hard to be strong and courageous but in this moment, it is so difficult to go beyond my feelings that I am having in the flesh.  My flesh cries out to take initiative to try and fix a situation that truly can only be in God's hands.  I know the more I desire to walker closer with Christ, the more I am going to be tested.  I have the upper hand....as long as I stand firm and remain steadfast in Him.  I have to trust His grace and know that He will deliver my family from the battles and pain we have endured recently.

I have sat and listened to the lyrics of Tenth Avenue's Worn for the past 20 minutes and that sums up every feeling I have this second.  The song has not only comforted me, but allowed me to "break".  I am crying out with all I have left....I need the struggle to end; I need my families hearts mended from being torn. 

I am so weak....emotionally and mentally.  I don't like being weak.  I am not a weak person.  I am one of those that confronts something head on when needed too; that doesn't like things to pass by without being fixed.  I dislike controversy; I like everything peaceful and settled.  I like to be in control so relinquishing my control up to my Father is a test within itself. 

I just ask that everyone keep my family in your prayers.  I am not ready to open up and share what we are walking through at this time.  I know God will heal those of us that are brokenhearted and embrace us as we cry out to Him.  That doesn't make it any easier.....(back to that flesh battle again!!!).

So, I guess it's another great reminder for me to "Renew" my mind, my heart and my trust in Him.  I am just so worn........

Do We Know Ourselves?

It's such a beautiful day here today in NC.  There is no way you'd know that we had a snow day on Friday because it's in the high 50's today.  The dogs are running around outside and Meadow is sunbathing.  They are so funny.  Just like kids when it comes to needing their play time! I'd be lost without my sweet pack in my life.

I have been reading My One Word and continuing to work on my Siesta Scripture Verses.  I simply cannot wait for April 12th to get here for the Beth Moore conference.  God is gonna move!!!

Last night I was reading and studying and something caught my attention and really stood out to me from what an excerpt from "My One Word".  The individual had chosen the word Knowledge as their word for the year.  They had stated that one of the reasons why they had chosen it was because we have to learn to accept things in our lives that only God can help us with in order to grow IN Him.  In order to know God, we have to know ourselves. You have to see who you are and be willing to change into a vessel for Him.  That is when you truly learn to know Him in a deeper way.

 I LOVE that!!! It makes perfect sense! It's exactly how I want to "Renew" my life in Him.  He is so gracious and merciful to us.  Praying everyone has a blessed week and that you will grow deeper with God by getting to know yourself better. 

Renew

Definition of RENEW

1.   to make like new : restore to freshness, vigor, or perfection

2 to make new spiritually : regenerate

3.  to restore to existence : revive

4.  to make extensive changes in : rebuild

 5. to do again : repeat

6.   to begin again : resume

All those definitions describe the very reason why I have chosen the word RENEW as My One Word for 2013.  Yes, I'm close to 2 months late, but better late than never! I could choose each and every word that was written along with the definitions.  I need to rebuild spiritually, I need to resume my relationship with Christ and I desire to be revived.  Hence, RENEW!!!

Siesta Scripture Memory Verse 4

So today is the day for a new verse! I have to admit, I was struggling memorizing the last one.  I don't know why because it seemed much simpler than the previous two.  I had index cards everywhere Monday evening trying to meet my goal and by yesterday morning, it finally stuck with me! Yay God!!!

The verse I chose to memorize and place in my heart next is Joshua 1:9:

"This is my command-by strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged.  For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."  NLT

The past month has been a trial within itself and once the storm settles, there is always another storm building up around the corner.  This verse is speaking to me during a time of great need so I know that it will be planted deep in my heart to help me during the next few weeks...and then for eternity.


So, what verse speaks to you today?

 

My Valentine

 

Jesus is my Valentine.  Not just today, but EVERYDAY!! He has given us the most incredible gift of love and continues to do so no matter how far we may stray from Him.  Today, take a moment to reflect on all that He has blessed you with.  Thank Him and tell Him how much you truly love Him.  Have a wonderful Valentine's Day my friends!

Create In Me A New Heart

It has been an emotional past few weeks.  Many things have happened within my family but God has been right there to hold us all together.  It made me realize that I do indeed need to spend much more "alone" time with Him.  So, I have decided to give up Facebook for Lent.  Yes, I will miss my daily encouraging words, catching up with all my fabulous friends and playing the few games I enjoy, but I saw God move in such a gracious way lately that I owe Him that much of me right now.

I have been working on Beth Moore's bible study of David:  Seeking A Heart Like His.  That is what I desire this holiday season as I stop to reflect on the awesome of God's abundant love and mercy.  We have so much to be thankful for each and every day that we often take it for granted.  As I study each and every word and pray for God to use this study to help me create a new heart just like David had, I know I will be even stronger, better, and most importantly, closer to my Father.

What have you decided to sacrifice to get closer to your Heavenly Father this Easter season?